The second heat of this year’s contest has occurred, and although this day I was out skiing and bustin’ my butt, I watched a recording and the following applies. I dare say that I’m happy I wasn’t watching it live, because it was a little bit of a train wreck, so to say.

Brolle – 7 Days and 7 Nights
=> Globen

Despite what the majority of people say, I really don’t like this song. There are several reasons, and I will explain why. First of all, I don’t like people that are covered in tattoos. It makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable. Secondly, any man prettier than a girl should never qualify in Melodifestivalen. Thirdly, his hair really bothers me to an extent that can’t be expressed via text or gesture. Fourthly, the song was so à la Elvis Presley that it made me really question the whole things general integrity. The song is basically okay and well performed, but I would like it if it was any other guy doing it. It doesn’t help that Brolle has the aura of a douchebag guy, but I’ll stop there before I offend someone.

Loreen – My Heart is Refusing me
=> Andra Chansen

I’m a little confused with the already major train wreck of the evening. What the fuck is this girl wearing? A bunch of red strings that make her look like a strung out red grape, for lack of a better explanation. Musically she’s got a great voice and executes the electro-dance song, but I don’t really see it going anywhere or really doing anything. It’s so busy on stage, and I’m just kind of hoping that it ends. The way she keeps looking at people also, makes me think that she’s a little stuck up. At least she laughs, in some respect instead of looking strung-out like she does during the performance.

Babsan – Ge mig en spanjor
❗ Personal Favourite

Following the theme of train wreck, this fits in the category of good train wreck, and bad train wreck. Knowingly being the gag entry is difficult enough, but quite frankly it’s a good drag act, and it’s ernest. I swear that I’m convinced that she/he/it is putting everything it has into singing “ja må jag leva, ge mig en spanjor” cause suddenly I feel like I want a Spaniard too. I like the fact that my mystery sexy dancer is in this act. It’s in the way she moves, and every single little head, hand, arm, leg movement that makes me smile and think “yes”! Then we have sexy dancers thrusting all over the place and stripping, and it’s just about all that I can take. Even my coworker said “wow she’s got bitchin’ legs” ! Only my legs are better!

Elisabeth Andreassen – Vaken i en dröm
❗ Personal Favourite
Göteborg.04-Elisabeth Andreassen

Wow this was voted last, and really I can understand why and why not. For that reason, it’s also a train wreck. Sure Bettan is awesome, and has a fantastic voice, and a song that just may be a little too good, but nothing really is going on during this song. It’s by far the easiest song to take a screenshot, because Elisabeth always looks 100% awesome, even with her eyes closed! I suspect that the the boring ballad lack of appeal, and the fact that she’s Norwegian contributed to the backlash of lack of voters; cause Lord knows there wasn’t much better in the heat that I liked.

Sanna Nielsen – I’m in love
=> Globen
Göteborg.05-Sanna Nielsen

I’m so teetering on this entry to be a personal favourite or not. It’s about the only non train-wreck song of the evening, and as expected Sanna was fantastic. The song leaves space for improvement and doesn’t have much inspiration and is just classic sclagger-pop, and the performance is a lot bland for what it’s worth and what Sanna can do, but it’s certainly deserving of it’s place in the big Globe.

The Moniker – Oh My God!
❗ Andra Chansen
Göteborg.06-The Moniker

The theme of train wrecks continue. The song has the same title as this year’s entry from “Le Kid” but the only differences is this time we have a monk looking shaved head guy looking like he’s spazzed out on drugs. I’d say that he doesn’t fool anyone, singing about a woman, as my first thought is “big fat mo” but then I see how poorly and awkwardly he dances and I see the light. He’s a big ambiguous one, and the song didn’t leave anything in my mind to comment on. Funky retro style performance, nothing hot to look at.. hmm!

Anniela – Elektrisk

The train just hit electricity, and what the hell is going on? It’s like a really bad Swedish version of Lady GaGa. Thank God there is some music in Swedish this heat, but is SVT really serious with this song? I don’t really see where it’s going or what’s going on. The green thing on the dress just makes it a fashion disaster, and generally seeking it’s generic. I just keep thinking “ok it’s almost over.. just one more verse, then one more song!”

Christian Walz – Like Suicide
❗ Personal Favourite
Göteborg.08-Christian Walz

So what happens when you know a name, have never seen the person, and then are shocked at what you see? Train wreck, yup you got it! I actually have something in my iPod playlist with Christian, but it’s from so long ago I barely even remembered. I had no idea that he’d look so out of it, and so unawesome. Critically speaking his voice is painfully whiney, almost like Amy Diamond (shudder), and the content of the song is a bit risky, to say the least, but at least by the end of the song he looks so crazy and dishevelled that he actually might commit suicide. For all intensive purposes I don’t condone suicide, but after the heat’s show, the only thing keeping me from doing it is the thought of awesome drag queens, my mystery dancer, and the host(s) upon whom I’ll ode at another time. Upon later review of this song, I actually have come to like it a lot more and I’m a bit disappointed that it didn’t qualify… I guess I saw the light, eventually.

As one can judge from my judgements in the last 8 songs, I really only liked a few, quite literally. One for it’s awesomeness, one for it’s musical quality, and half of one for it’s potential. So as the critics often say, “next please!”

Thank God the train wreck is over!