karma

It happens once in awhile where you encounter a movie or a film that just speaks to you. Recently I’ve had a few that really just pop out to me and leave me begging for more or with a pit in my stomach and the need to binge watch. Today I watched a series through from Episode 1 to Episode 8 without interruption twice through. I just needed to see it again and upon second watch it made me think about something.

You might be wondering what sort of series could have such an impact. Well it could be any number of the fantastic series that have been produced in the last few years. Bridgerton is like a drug that keeps on giving, with the family drama of ancient times that just gives and gives and gives. Merlí, a series about a philosophy professor in Catalonia and the subsequent spin-off Merlï Sapere Aude in which a main character of the original series follows in his inspired teachers footsteps. And then there is the chillingly disturbing series Anatomy of a Scandal which caught me staying up way too late on a Sunday night. David E. Kelly strikes again, I said upon reading the credits. No, dear reader, these are not the series that haunt me in the most positive of ways; this one is more and more inspiring, and unsurprisingly a Netflix series (and let’s be honest, they are all just of a greatly high quality).

For the last few weeks I’ve been on a Big Brother fix, and as a result I’ve seen a lot of manipulation and interaction between people in a superficial circumstance and it got me thinking about the amount of manipulation that occurs in real life, without any real consideration for others.

Manipulation is a dirty business, and I try at all costs to avoid it to keep good karma, but sometimes we get caught in the crossfire, so to speak. For me, I had someone random contact me who was connected through another person in my life. I decided at that point, since for one it was out of the blue and I thought it to be none of their business, to not engage in interactions.

It wasn’t until recently that I found out through the grapevine that this person was caught trying to manipulate someone’s emotions and feelings that really affected other people’s friendships and relationships. I laughed a little bit to myself and patted myself on the back for several reasons. Firstly for not being involved because as a result no foul can be called on me. Secondly, it blew up in their face and since they aren’t in my life it doesn’t matter to me. Thirdly, because they made these poor decisions, they learned their lesson and got what was coming to them.

Karma really is a bitch sometimes.

Well I deserved it. I can’t say that I could go on so long being such the way that I am without karma coming to bite me in the ass at some point. How can someone walk around all the time, with not real slutty attitude, and be such a flirt without someone freaking out at some point? It’s true that the vast majority of people at university are incredibly hormonal, due to aunt-flow or just the “normal” hormonal changes that go on in men, the damned gender. So it was bound to happen, that I run into some problems and people start getting mad at me, for, how shall we say, get them all rilled up for nothing?

I any case, karma has come back to kick me, the teasy-flirt. Turns out that having a meal-hall crush is just as depressing now as it was in first year. Every since September I have been prancing around campus with the same sort of expectations and observances as before, but it only just hit me last week when I realised something. On whom I had a mealhall crush, was completely aware, and was using it and doing exactly what I do: tease right back.

How could I not have seen it? Really now, I’m such an observant person, but it never dawned on me that it could not be completely obvious of my infatuation, and that someone would mention it or act on it. So when I’m standing at the ommlette line, and talking innocently to Rania, and MHC turns around to stare at me with a devilish smile, I started to get that realisation! This is compounded to the fact that whenever MHC is leaving, I’m sitting, and then eventually staring; they are past me over at the sandwhich bar, and then turns directly to me with the same smirk and stares at me for a moment, basically knowing that I was staring. It’s so unfair.

The same principles and beliefs that I have employed are being redone onto me, and now I’m realising how much of a horrible person I am because of it all! I’m not regretting it, because it’s fun, just I’m realising that it’s coming to bite me in the ass because I know it’s going nowhere. MHC knows I fancy them, isn’t interested, but still is a tease to make me feel worse. I’m sure they wouldn’t be so pro-teasing if they knew that I had anxiety before Christmas. I suppose that was partially my karma, but this is more.

Thus what am I going to do? I’ve decided to tease right back, and play this up as much as humanly possible. I always out-trump people in the awkward category. Therefore I’m going to be such a tease that it actually forces them to be uncomfortable and awkward. I’m not going to crack, No-Sir-E-Boob! I like to see people squirm and get all awkward, and then make them squirm even more. I suspect that said MHC won’t be able to keep up with my awesomeness after one week of such behaviours.

We shall see.