Asexuality Awareness Week: Day 4 “Aromantic”

Delving deeper into the depths of our asexuality quest, the next stop is the aromantic orientation. Basically what this means is that a person does not experience or has little romantic attraction. This is not exclusive to the asexual community, because some people that are any other orientation (allosexual or asexual) might be included depending on their levels of attraction.

Many of these people end up spending their lives outside of relationships and surrounding themselves with friends with whom they can spend their time and have their emotional and social needs met.

When speaking about aros (aromantics) it’s important to recognize and consider the different varieties of relationships that might apply: platonic, acquaintance, collegial, familial or other. Each is a bit different in themselves, but also similar in some ways. As a basis this video is an aromantic explaining how she feels:

Whether it be an asexual or allosexual, romantic, or aromantic, it’s important to respect the needs of others as they might not be what assume, or want. People are, of course, individuals and need to be treated as such, with the same respect that we expect ot be bestowed upon ourselves. This is especially important for communities where the mosaic is being woven with more colours than ever before!

Emotional Thrashing

When is it just for one to be emotionally thrashed? Is there a judge in the universe that would order such a thing to happen? Is it fair that anyone is thrashed about emotionally?

The answer to all of these questions according to my own philosophies is obviously negative; no person deserves to be emotionally thrashed. So what types of these circumstances would occur?

The Strangers
Bumping into people randomly through life, that you have never seen or vaguely know obviously has less value as they have know basis upon which to judge or asses. It’s like wailing in the air attempting to land a blow, which may hurt, but never sting.

The Acquaintance
A person that knows a little about you or that has met you a few times bears a stronger punch only because they have some basis upon which to bare their hurt. Often examples of this are friends of friends trying to inflict pain upon other people to be benefit themselves or their friends.

The Friend
Piqued by the pain of a friend saying rude things and judging someone is a difficult scar to heal, because it’s based on some truth, knowledge, and understanding of a person. Often examples of this type of emotional thrashing, is betrayal of a friend. Why would a best friend sleep with their best friend’s partner? Jealousy if often the root of this particular branch.

The Partner
A scar that lasts because it’s betrayal with a poison that doesn’t allow to be healed. Often occurs in “tiffs” or “breaks” for relationships, but in my opinion it doesn’t make much sense because a partner is someone upon whom one should rely for emotional support. It’s akin to being kicked while you’re down.

The Family
Perhaps the most grievous and deadly of all betrayals; the one of blood. In olden days such treatment would be blasphemous, and today it’s similar to hurting oneself. Why would a brother, sister, parent, cousin, aunt, uncle inflict such harm upon a person? If not to harm them, but to kill them inside; nothing else.