So I’ve been sick with the flu since Tuesday, and more or less it’s rendered me completely unable to do anything since I was dizzy and had horrible fevers and everything. Doctors can’t do anything for me, and all I did was rest, no classes, no assignments, nothing. So this weekend is going to be hell! I have an assignment due at noon tomorrow, which I haven’t started. 2 take home quizes due on monday, plus a composition that I need to have done for tomorrow to edit. I’m editing someone else’s paper, as well we have our semi formal tonight, which clearly I’m not going to since I’m still slightly tired.

So productivity is 0%, and health is about at 75% (maybe that’s pushing it a bit). Oh well, since I don’t have enough time to even eat, I better go and work, and write later…

PS: Yes I’m alive, just not kicking! |-|

Sketchy Dream

Okay so I guess it was more of a nightmare becasue I woked up about 20 times last night in paranoia each time because of this dream.. Here’s how it goes:

My parents are trying to ‘steal’ my eyes by killing me or something, so I escape from the back yard to neighbours house where I ask for help and they invite me in to stay with them. I’ve never seen them before, but they are across the street and have a cinema in their living room. It’s really weird, and doesn’t make sense I know but still… It’s important. So the neighbours protect me from my evil parents and him and her have a son and daughter around my age that go to school, and they all study French like me, so I stay at home in locked house while everyone goes to school / does housework. My adopted brother and sister are both really attractive, so I feel awkward since I don’t seem to belong, but then my parents come to try to kidnap me, and my brother saves me, and then I don’t remember some stuff.

So then my new parents set up a meeting with the crazy old parents and they discuss what is going on while I am in chains becasue my eyes are wanted so badly (by the way, yes I know I have amazing eyes:P)

So in the end, I end up living with the new parents and be happier because they actually love me for once and appreciate my company. My normal family is the opposite, and it doesn’t suprise me that in the dream they were trying to kill me, but the whole neighbourhood was all deserted and from the window I could see my old house and the sketchy parents talking to people all the time, plotting the revenge.

How odd eh? I will look the meanings up in my dream book and then write about them later, since now it’s naptime for me as I taught yoga at 06.00 this morning!

Oh confusion

Okay so why is it that interaction with people just makes me more and more confused in so many ways that I don’t even know how to describe. If someone is being a weirdo to me, after knowing them for five years, and me being more open that I’ve ever been with anyone, and I just get ‘I dunno’ or something like that. How can I expect to feel like a human being who interacts with people, when people won’t even interact with me and be hoenst with me.

And so someone makes a decent observation of me tonight too:

21.31.53 ::Ian:: säger:
you are scared of people.. you dont trust anyone…you think people are out to get you
21.32.07 ::Ian:: säger:
you try best to keep yourself out of any danger

How is it that someone I’ve known for about 2 weeks able to make an observation like this, and someone that’s known me for 5 years not? I trust Gus with everything that he would ever ask, and yet when I ask a simple question he can’t be honest with me. I don’t know how to understand this, or why something stupid like this always happens to me.


And I thought that the play that I went to see last night was dramatic! Wow last night totally beat it in the drama department by a lot!

So apart from being upset then being okay again, I got woken up at 03.30 by a loud yell of something like “Pat didn’t do it, Pat didn’t do it” and then a huge burst of glass that sounded to me at first, in my sleepy daze, like a microwave dropping on the floor and waking up. Now after 02.00, it’s supposed to be quiet and people get fined for being noisy, but I guess everyone got woken up because apparently the Dons and Monitors were outside chasing some american-football players that had thrown a piece of wood through our front window. How silly, so people were walking around all night, some of which I didn’t want to see, becasue of aforementioned reasons.

Anyways, after all the kafuffel, I went back to bed trying to sleep, but it took me until about 04.30 to finally do it because my mind was going everywhere thinking about the worst situations that could happen to me for some reason. So I had a thought about walking into the cafeteria and everyone staring at me and then laughing, and then me getting my food not knowing what was going on, still looking at me. So then I hear someone make comment or something, and then I dropped my tray while holding a cup of tea, and then I walk over to someone and give them dirty look and throw the hot water at them for telling others that which happend. And then I storm off and lock myself up in room forever, and leave and get new identity or something..

Sounds silly and over-dramatic, but I have quite the vivid imagination, and I’m so afrad of so many things, so scarying me or something is quite simple, and I panic quite well if under eanormus amounts of pressures.

:DD Funny like a bunny, oh well thankfully none will happen, but golly my mind goes crazy very easily, and it was the first night that I didn’t go to be bed at 22.00!! I was a lil upset that now I wont have energy to complete today!

1 Hour Later

Okay so I’m calmer now that I’ve been here laying down listening to music, but still I’m quite upset. Why is our world like this? Why do people make decisions based on things not on their own opinions? It’s so sad, as the music still plays from the hallway. I will never sleep so maybe I should post something here to entertain someone, including myself!

So it was beautiful day, where I returned some videos from the rental place. Brothers Grimm, and Skeleton Key, quite a good few movies although I don’t really like Matt Damon, he tries to be Jonny Depp too hardly, and it doesn’t work for him!

Speaking of moviestars, I need to get some new clothes since none are acceptable for me in other’s opinions. I think that I look fine, but sure I guess everyone is entitled to self-improvement. Just hook me up with some clothes that make me look hot, and I’m off and not being the ‘cute-young’ one anymore! :crazy:

Let me just dance around and then the bed calls me, even though I’m already lying there!! :wave:

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