Okay so I’m calmer now that I’ve been here laying down listening to music, but still I’m quite upset. Why is our world like this? Why do people make decisions based on things not on their own opinions? It’s so sad, as the music still plays from the hallway. I will never sleep so maybe I should post something here to entertain someone, including myself!

So it was beautiful day, where I returned some videos from the rental place. Brothers Grimm, and Skeleton Key, quite a good few movies although I don’t really like Matt Damon, he tries to be Jonny Depp too hardly, and it doesn’t work for him!

Speaking of moviestars, I need to get some new clothes since none are acceptable for me in other’s opinions. I think that I look fine, but sure I guess everyone is entitled to self-improvement. Just hook me up with some clothes that make me look hot, and I’m off and not being the ‘cute-young’ one anymore! :crazy:

Let me just dance around and then the bed calls me, even though I’m already lying there!! :wave:

So right now is probably not the best time for me to be writing about my so called ‘life’ because I’m quite enraged. To be honest, I don’t get upset easily, but after tonight’s events, not only am I upset but I’m madder than I have ever been before (including at myself). How can people sink so low, that they are pressured into doing things that are morally, and just plain stupid.

House Executive ‘Initiation’ was tonight while I was at a French play, and quite frankly; I come home to a house in dismay, and people so sick that it would be mistaken for an American frat house (with girls living there). Three members of the executive next year were pressured into getting drunk for the first time to a point where two were sent to the hospital; and the worst part, is they dont even drink! They were pressured into it, as the old exec. cited ‘honour’ or ‘duty’. I have never heard more stupid stuff in my life!
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Ascars, what are they you ask? Well I will tell you in such an elegant way, since it’s supposed to be an ‘elegant’ evening. Ascars is my universities’ version of the Oscars, so it’s where many band performances are and people get lots of awards like Student of the Year or somehing like that. Well I must say that I’m dissapointed that nobody from my house won anything, but then again I’m not suprised. Withing being bitter at all, I must say that our house executive has done a very poor job at integrating all the new students, and even throwing events that people come out to due to the fact that the social chairs only do events that they would like; how sad!

Anyways, ‘House of the Year’ went to Windsor, which is not suprising at all considering their executive is amazing and they have the most fun. It’s funny, because I debated to live there next year, but since I wanted a single room I came back here.. I don’t think I could have standed a double room again this year! Anyways, so everyone was dressed up and went to the largest hall for anything in the East Coast, Marjorie Young Bell Convocation Hall, which seats about 3’000 or so. The venue is really a wonderful place to see as the entrance is made in marble completely, with a fountain of some sort of mythical characters who are pracing and froliking around.

So everyone in semi-formal attire, naturally afterwards everyone got really really drunk or something, and were loud while I decided to keep quiet and do some work in my room. I have a presentation to do on Monday for music history, as well as some French grammar, and some assignments that will be due in 2 weeks (even after classes are done)! Oh well I can handle it, I think 8|

Oh and as a side note, why are people so loud, even when they aren’t playing music? Music I can handle, but yelling and screaming swear-words and such is un-necessary! I had half a brain to go out there and scold them in Swedish telling them to grow up or something; but I know they would have laughed and carried on anyways. And so I watched a movie about a place in the U.S.A. where they have these special turtles, and a whole bunch of the characters are all inter-related due to adoptions. It’s really quite a thought-provoking movie, but sad becasue at the end, the secondary character who has been wandering the U.S.A. since he was 17, died of HIV, and his adoption mother or birth mother never got to see him before it happend, since he denied medication. Really very sad, and kept me awake in bed for awhile before I fell alseep.

I consider myself an emphetic person, but honestly I could never deal with something like that I think, or even try to understand since I’ve never been in a position where I could die at any moment. Hmm, some things to ponder clearly!

Ahh so I’m off to go teach a 2hr lesson of yoga at the gym like always. Maybe the class will be less than 30 students today :roll:, yeah right I wish! I’ll write more later after I return some DVDs to the rental store in town.

Okay so today I was listening through my random playlist while I was writing a stupid music analysis project that’s 20 pages; such a waste of paper! Anyways, as I was saying, this music came on, and it reminded me of Da Buzz, a group that I heard longwhile ago on Melodifestivalen years ago. Although this wasn’t the song, I have the album on my playlist and ‘Lost without you’ was playing, and well despite having a very fast tempo and everything, it’s quite a sad song which really made me think.

Am I really lost? I don’t think so, but when I hear the song I do feel slightly, is that a problem of some sort, and if so, what the heck do I do about it? Hmmm interesting questions.

[Da Buzz]

Here I go, turn around in my life once again.
There I see, all the love of my life for the last time.

Please tell me I’m wrong
Oh say that you love me
Tell me that you and I will conquer it all…

I’m lost without you, I’m lost if we’re through
I wanna hold you tight
Wanna see your smile, closer than before
I’m lost without you, I’m lost if we’re through
I wanna hold you tight
Wanna love you more, can’t belive it’s true.
I´m lost without you.

A little touch from you lips, I think I will die.
Just a little more of it all, and I know I will loose it all.

Please tell me…

I’m lost, lost in my love
My love for you Will last to eternity,
Im lost without you

Okay so interesting quotes no? Anyways, today was long, all five classes and nothing too interesting. I didn’t fall asleep until about 04.00 last night, so I was very tired for the whole day, and I am going to bed now and it’s about 01.30 so it’s a good time for me!! Just Instrumental Conducting at 08.30 and then I am free until 14.30 to edit my copy of the analysis project, and print it off, and then hand it in, and all in the meantime I am going to pop over to the French department and catch up on some stuff that I am behind on because of our mid-term today. The mid-term wasn’t that exciting, and it wasn’t that hard, but I didn’t seem to remember some literary words.. What’s a sanction and connotation anyways? 🙄 Rather who cares is the question!

I hardly ate today, maybe I should take more time to eat some food that way I won’t be so darn tired all the time! We shall see, and as a result no sign of the M.H.C.! Sad, yes I know but today comes first clue: browned hair >:XX. And now I go running off in an embarrassed scurry so that I can hide away from any that realize how vague I am with everything!

Until tomorrow, when I am actually alive, because I now feel like a zombie!

PS: Another great song by Da Buzz, and nearly my favourite of the album is the following song, which I’m not sure applies to me in any way at this point in my life :o:

“I’ve been waiting for someone like you”

Late at night, when I close my eyes
And think about my life
No misery, he would care for me
That’s how it’s gonna be

Now I, belive that it’s true
Cause I’m standing here with you

I’ve been waiting for someone like you,
Day and night, all of my life
I’ve been waiting for this to come true,
Deep in my heart, I’ve been waiting for someone like you

When you are here, everything is clear
All I wanna have is you
We make the candle light, burn so bright
Then I fall into your arms

Now I belive that it’s true
Cause I’m standing here with you

I’ve been waiting for someone like you,
Day and night, all of my life
I’ve been waiting for this to come true,
Deep in my heart, I’ve been waiting for you

Can you express your feelings, like you did,
I feel so unsecure, cause you´re everything to me
You’re like the sunshine, the birds in the sky,
The stars I see at night, I wanna hold you and take us to the sky

I’ve been waiting for someone like you,
Day and night, all of my life
I’ve been waiting for this to come true, Deep in my heart,
I’ve been waiting for someone like you

Oh wow, at 08.30 hearing a phrase like that is just about the funniest thing that can happen all day! So it happend in conducting class when we are doing weird assymetrical meters were we have to be very precise and visual and silly stuff like that. So Norrah goes up and she is doing it, and it honestly looks like she is throwing out her arm just trying to get the basic pattern down, and afterwards our teacher Dr. Starling just tells here that she’s give’n ‘er really good, that-is-to-say she’s pounding away at it, or something along those lines. I don’t really understand a lot of English slang or idioms, but I try to learn. I don’t think I will be using this slang phrase though, it sounds really ghetto or something!

So after class I do 4 loads of laundry (gosh a lot of clothes), and then allwhile I am doing study notes for my stupid French Literary Analysis course, which I honestly think is the hardest thing. The concepts are the same as in any language, but since a lot of the words I don’t understand or use on a regular basis, I won’t be able to remember them at 09.30 this morning. Oh well, by-the-way, I should probably be in bed now, since it’s 01.42 and test is in few hours.. Oh well we will see..

Other than that, food was good at the cafeteria and I saw my M.H.C. (meal-hall-crush) off in the distance. I still am really sketchy on the details about them, but we will see after awhile. Only like one month left before I go back to Toronto, but still I’m slightly infatuated, despite being an asexual being ❗

I think we play dodgeball tomorrow night as a residence house, but I don’t know if I will. I love to play it, but there is so much drama going on in the house I don’t know if I can manage, and I have a huge music analysis project due on Wednesday which I really need to get a bunch done tomorrow. I figure that I can do a lot of it in a short amount of time since a lot of it is already done anyways.

Oh and another think since I’m rambeling. What’s the deal with all the other non-private universities going on strike? Crazy Canadians don’t know what to do with themselves these days with a stupid conservative government. Learn to become more ‘accepting’ and liberal like the old government of last year! And another thing, I’ve been having weird dreams lately, but more on that later since my eyes and fingers are growing very numb (I think that’s how it’s spelled), meh!